Dane Cook’s SNL anxiety attack!

Stalking Your Ex’s Food Blog – Mekki Leeper – Stand-Up Featuring

Hi, everybody. I’m Mekki. I’m Moroccan. Most of my family still lives over there in Africa so I don’t know why I look like this, either. But– (audience laughs) Moroccans are supposed to be like really hot or something but every now and again they pop out looking like Logic. So– (audience laughs) That’s what […]

Seth’s Mom Is Quitting Cooking After 50 Years of Marriage

-Hi, guys. How are you? -Hello. Got a gin and tonic. -Yeah. Yeah, you have a drink there. There’s your gin and tonic. I think you guys have a couple Scotches down there. I think they’re both here. -All right. -And we’ll do a quick toast to the continuing tradition. Congratulations on getting asked back. […]

Getting Broken Up With When You Have Food Poisoning – Josh Johnson

– So I’m gonna start off by saying I get broken up with a lot, all right? Usually by text message. And just so you know, if you do that, you’re bogus, all right? The most recent time I got broken up with in a text message, I had terrible food poisoning. All right, so […]

Dane Cook and Jimmy Compare Embarrassing Headshots

-Welcome back. I’m happy you’re here. How are you feeling? -It’s so good to be back. I feel great. -Yeah. -I feel — You know what? I feel great, but can I just — Can I get right into something that’s been on my mind lately? -Sure, of course. -I’m 47, Jimmy. And — Can […]

Patton Oswalt – Tragedy Plus Comedy Equals Time – Supermarket Depression

THE LAST TIME IT GOT ME WAS PRETTY CLEVER. I’LL GIVE IT CREDIT. IT WAS A TUESDAY, LIKE 11:00 IN THE MORNING. AND I WENT TO A GROCERY STORE NEAR MY HOUSE. SO, JUST GET THAT VISUAL IN YOUR HEAD. IT’S A GROCERY STORE, 11:00 A.M. ON A WEEKDAY — LIKE SIX OTHER PEOPLE IN […]

Kevin Farley Talks Comedy on the Road While Decorating Cookies | Treat Yourself | Allrecipes.com

– Hi everybody, I’m Kevin Farley and I’m gonna decorate this here cookie to look exactly like me, I think. Maybe we’ll start with some white frosting ’cause I’m white. I don’t have any confidence in this at all. You might recognize my voice from some of the characters on F is for Family. I […]

Dane Cook – Working at Burger King

FIRST JOB I HAD. BURGER KING. [woman laughs] [mocks laugh] [laughter] I’LL COME UP THERE, MA’AM. MY BROTHER GOT ME THE JOB TOO. MY BROTHER GOT ME THE JOB. MM-HMM. HE WAS THE MANAGER, AND HE GOT ME THE JOB. YOU THINK THAT WOULD BE COOL, YOU KNOW, BECAUSE HE’S MY BRO, BUT HE WAS […]

Rodney Dangerfield’s Top 10 Jokes About His Wife’s Cooking

– Oh yeah, my wife can’t do nothin’ right. She can’t cook, the worst cook in the world. Gave my kid alphabet soup, he spelled out help. (audience laughing) What a lousy cook, I mean, how can toast have bones? (audience laughing) She’s a lousy cook, too, she can’t cook at all. I leave dental […]

Kelsey Cook – Homemade Sex Toy – This Is Not Happening – Uncensored – Exclusive

– “Um…I wanted to know what sex felt like, “so I took your manicure tool, and I put it…” [laughter][dark electronic music][bell dinging] Oh. [chuckles] Nicely done. Yes. Mmm. Mmm! [moaning] [piglet whining]♪ ♪[fork clatters]♪ ♪[whining]♪ ♪[whining continues]♪ ♪Your mama’s so delicious.[cheers and applause]She has her own podcast, “Cook’d.” Please give it up for Kelsey […]